The vacation photos. The career announcements. The relationships that look effortless. Meanwhile, you're scrolling and wondering what you're doing wrong. That's FOMO — the fear of missing out — and it's never been more common. It's not about events. It's about the feeling that everyone else found the right life and you somehow missed the memo.
Scrolling and Falling Behind
The fear of missing out can be subtle — a background hum that makes it hard to enjoy what you already have.
Scrolling through other people's highlights and measuring your life against theirs. Knowing it's not fair — they're showing the best parts — but making the comparison anyway. It's automatic, and it always leaves you feeling like you're falling behind.
Every time you choose one thing, you're haunted by what you didn't choose. Staying in feels like failing. Missing an event feels like losing something you'll never get back. Even when you're tired, "no" comes with a cost.
What you have is fine — maybe even good. But there's a nagging sense that it could be better, that the real thing is happening somewhere else. It's hard to land anywhere when part of you is always looking at the next thing.
Opening social media without deciding to. Refreshing feeds to see what happened. Each check is supposed to help, but it usually makes the feeling worse — more input, more comparison, more restlessness.
If that feels familiar, it can help to slow down and figure out what you actually want — not what looks good, but what would feel meaningful.
Why FOMO Hijacks Your Joy
This fear of missing out isn't a personal failing — it's a natural response to how the world works right now.
Sometimes the comparison trap isn't really about what others have — it's rooted in a deeper sense that you're somehow not good enough as you are.
When You Feel Not Good EnoughThat left-behind feeling gets louder when you don't know what actually matters to you. When values are unclear, everything looks appealing. Sometimes the way forward is to sort out what's real from what's just noise.
Breaking the FOMO Loop
The answer to the scroll-and-compare cycle isn't seeing more or doing more. It's getting clearer about what genuinely matters to you.
Limit the Feed
Less comparison input, less fuel.
Name Your Values
What matters to you, not to them?
Practice Presence
The antidote to elsewhere is here.
Track What Lands
Notice what genuinely satisfies you.
Getting clearer on your own values helps — and if you notice the comparison goes deeper, it might be worth understanding the social anxiety that can fuel it.
When Being Around People Feels HardPause the Comparison Now
If the comparison trap is loud right now, these small shifts can help.
Quick resets help in the moment — but if that fear of missing out keeps pulling you out of your own life, there's usually something worth understanding underneath. thisOne is a thinking partner that helps you figure out what you actually want — not what looks good online, but what genuinely matters to you. A conversation that helps you see what's going on beneath the comparison.
The Bigger Picture
Everyone else also has that left-behind feeling. Those highlight reels are made by people wondering if they're doing it wrong too. You're comparing your insides to their outsides — and that comparison will never be fair. Missing out on some things means you're present for others. The peace comes from choosing, not from having everything.