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Decision Making

Decision Making Framework

When the spreadsheet isn't enough

You've read the frameworks. Still paralyzed? There's a reason. Most decision-making advice treats decisions like math problems — but you're not a calculator. You're a person with values, fears, and contradictions. The best decision making framework starts there, not with a spreadsheet.

When Frameworks Don't Land

You've done the work. The thinking just won't convert into action.

Frameworks That Don't Land

You've read the 10/10/10 rule, the Eisenhower matrix, the pros-and-cons approach. They all make sense on paper. But when you sit down with your actual decision, they don't dissolve the knot in your stomach. The framework works in theory. The fear works in reality.

Knowing Without Doing

The maddening part: you might already know what you'd choose. The information is there. The logic points one direction. But something won't let you pull the trigger — and no amount of analysis closes the gap between knowing and doing.

Decisions Under Decisions

"Should I take this job?" is really "Do I want to stay in this city?" "Should I say something?" is really "Am I willing to risk this relationship?" The real decision hides underneath the obvious one, and most frameworks don't dig that deep.

If the frameworks aren't landing, it might help to think it through with something that asks different questions.

Why Logic Isn't Enough

Every decision has three layers — and most frameworks only address the first one.

Layer 1: Information

Pros and cons, expected value, opportunity costs. Useful but rarely sufficient alone.

Layer 2: Values

What actually matters to you? What would you regret not trying? This is where most decisions get stuck.

Layer 3: Fears

What are you avoiding? What would you decide if fear wasn't a factor?

The Skip

Most people jump to Layer 1 because it feels productive. The block is usually in Layer 2 or 3.

When the block is fear — specifically, fear of choosing wrong and regretting it — there's a name for that. It's decision anxiety, and it's worth understanding on its own.

When Choosing Feels Impossible

The best decision making process isn't more analysis — it's a conversation that reaches the layers underneath. Sometimes it helps to just figure out what's blocking you.

A Decision Framework That Fits

These work best when combined with honest self-reflection — not as replacements for it.

The 10/10/10 Rule

How will you feel in 10 minutes, months, years?

Regret Minimization

At 80, which path would you regret not taking?

Two-Way Door Test

Reversible? Decide fast. Irreversible? Take time.

Flip a Coin

Notice your reaction. Disappointment reveals your answer.

The regret question is especially powerful for big life decisions. Jeff Bezos built a whole regret minimization framework around it.

The Regret Minimization Framework

Work Through the Layers

If a decision is stuck right now, work through these layers.

Frameworks are tools, but the real work happens in conversation — where the layers can surface naturally. thisOne is a thinking partner built for exactly this kind of stuck. You talk through the decision, it asks what's actually blocking you, and together you find what matters underneath the noise. Not a spreadsheet — a conversation that helps you see clearly.

The Bigger Picture

The best decision framework isn't a spreadsheet — it's a conversation. One that reaches past the logic and into the values and fears where the real decision lives. Start there, and the choice often becomes clearer than you'd expect.

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